The funny thing about relations is that we all strive to have good relations. The reality is that no matter how hard you try to have good relations, you will have an equal amount of bad relations. Why? Because everything in the universe is in balance. This means that for every good, it is paired with its equal & opposite bad. This is the basic universal truth of equilibrium.
Being a teacher of self-empowerment, means that I stick my neck out to teach topics that not many want to teach. Why? Because they perceive they have to be masters at it. The fact of universal laws is that everything is in balance. This means every one of us have an equal amount of good and bad side. What brings out the good and what brings out the bad in each of us is very much dependent on what we value and what our highest priority is. When our highest priority is challenged, we will be cruel. When our highest priority is supported we will be kind. So trying to be all good at all times is futile. How others perceive you will make you the villain in their eyes even if you perceive you are all good.
The next time you find yourself in the midst of a relationship struggle, ask yourself what are you challenging the other person on? When they are cruel towards you, ask yourself what are you challenging them on? And with the best of intentions, even if you stuff up the relationship in a royal fashion, reflect on the many you did the opposite on. Everything is in balance. Stand up and move forward with how you will approach it differently next time round without resenting the other person. This is the tricky part, as generally we all want to resent the other person in a bad relationship. I use the method taught to me by my teacher to get me back in equilibrium.
Bad relations arise to humble us and awaken us to our authentic self. If you have attracted a person you perceive treated you badly, the universe delivered the person to you for a reason. Authenticity is about embracing that there is both good & bad about ourself. If you perceive you are all good, the universe will deliver the challenge to humble you to balance your mindset. So I teach how to keep one's perception of one's self in balance accepting that it is just moments we can get this balance. Mastery is in the moment not in perfection all the time. Even I go through times where the universe delivers me a relationship challenge to bring me into balance. We all do.
Once you have a bad relationship and learn from it, you trans -end (ie end the trans) of that illusion/judgement and move on to the next level of judgement to break through. So having bad relations is a growing experience and is to be embraced as the stepping stone to handle the next relationship challenge. Hence you will notice that nobody alive has a beautiful, stain free relationship track record. Dig deep enough and you will see it exists in some or many areas of life - family conflict, team conflict, sibling conflict, spouse conflict etc.
It is futile to seek leaders to follow who are perfect. Rather, embrace the magnificence of the universe and all its glory knowing that who we are is both good and bad no matter how good we may want to perceive we or anyone else is.
Check out this interesting workshop I teach one on one or in groups: